Where Trees Meet Water (2017)

This project was shot in 2017 over 2 months when my photographic practice was only starting. The work is a bit clumpy and naïve yet it still holds meaning. The images also need some work but I like them as they are because that’s where I was. The journey through anxiety and loss alongside a desire for renewal resonates in hindsight in a different way.

The central theme in this project is self-contemplation. I explored places and spaces that evoke a strong sense of personal reflection; past and present. I went back to my family home in the countryside as well as visiting sites around Dublin where I’ve lived. These are all places where I’ve sat, alone, with my thoughts.

I wrote a piece of topographical prose (also clumpy in parts) responding to the places I visited and the images captured. It acts as a thread weaving through external and internal space and draws on writing’s I admire re-inflected with my memories, emotions and experiences evoked by the places I experienced while making the work.

Where Trees Meet Water

I hear my footsteps on the gravel path and a rippling stream nearby

The path widens and the late evening sun warms my face

My pace eases the turbulence within

I sit on a rocky throne by a sky lake shore and take solace in the deep still water

My thoughts drift like clouds narrating random fables seldom told

Unruffled by my presence birds chatter confident I can’t comprehend

I day dream and roots unfurl, stretching out slowly like fingers until grounded

Rugged and proud I make my stand as the tree in me takes hold

From the water I sense a presence bubbling below

An absence of thought engulfs me suddenly and ceaselessly

In a brief fleeting moment I catch a glimpse. I see you. I see me

Gurgling warm and frightening in the hidden depths unheard but calling

Lost loves simmer forth swelled by the freshest cut

The scratched surface an aperture to deeper suffering

A buried thought now reaped as grief

A dead flower, a fallen leaf

Down where the dark forest meets a watery grave sorrow pours into my soul

A stone in still water swamping my senses like a sad song

An overwhelming shrinking feeling familiar yet insufferable

Alone and abandoned like winter turf I run away

My path hindered by menacing gnarled trees reinforced by an ominous sky

Moss draped branches reach forth hung heavy with mourning for the daylight sun

Lost and scared with nowhere to turn my chest tightens

I close my eyes and cascade down the rabbit hole

The child within awakens and excites

I see visions old and almost forgotten, stowaways in my mind

Memories flood forth like snapshots

Echoes from happier times

Down the slipway into the abyss greeted by visions warm and sweet

Never ending summer days, one long lasting vivid reflection

The sound of children’s laughter with my own

Kicking football against a wall.

Walking in the field through tall wet grass and marching behind my dad struggling to reflect his steps

Warm thoughts of home comforts and my Mothers embrace

The sofa where I gaze at setting suns and the crows homeward bound

My unmade bed with peace so quiet my ears buzz

Walks by the calm and constant canal where trees and water meet

The bridge with locks beneath and forgotten stories of men long dead

The gate I painted by my fathers shed, faded and peeling

My forefathers shed and the battered door

I feel their presence and am home

I consider my life in Dublin and what I’ve become

A sun trapped door where cigarette butts lay guiltily on the ground

My bedroom window and long narrow gardens under great bulbous clouds

Where I dream of morning sun and my Robin friend

In the midst of metallic murmur I seek out space

Urban oases with echoes of familiar places

Walks on a ceaseless strand as sun succeeds recent rains

Patient posts in the park awaiting the Sunday game

The overheard exchanges of pale skinned swimmers

And Marley’s hard face heavenly gazing

When I’m old and restless and no longer fit to roam

My thoughts will drift to these places

Lingering on the Wicklow hills as deer cross my way

Sauntering through Sand dunes with windswept reeds gathering coloured shells

And when the last boat has parted

You will find me where trees meet water